Grocery Day, Again

Our new cash system has really been tough on me. I'm completely on board with the IDEA, but I always feel differently when I'm checking out at the grocery store.

Today I had 40 minutes to get groceries before we had company coming. I had $60, and this was generous of B because I had already spent $80 of my $100 this week at Sam's (but I did stock up on some things we really needed and use often!). He only had 20s and he generously upped my "allowance" from $40 to $60. (And YES, I know that 80 + 40 doesn't add up to 100 either. See, I'm telling you this system still has some kinks to work out!)

It just doesn't seem like I can get very much for $60. I tried. But I spent $80...six. I sheepishly admitted to B that I had a $20 and some ones in my wallet and I don't remember WHY, but it just seemed like groceries were a justified use for it.

STILL, I had to make hard (and fast!) decisions.

Grapefruit? The kids love them. $1 each. Really? Wish we would have brought more back from FL. They are SO good for breakfast. If I get two then four of us can have a half. . . Two it is.

Apples? Yum. We haven't had good apples for weeks. Organic apples are $1.99 EACH! I can't do that. We used red delicious for baked apples last week. Guess we'll pass this week. . .

Barley. And lentils. And rice. Can I get all three? Can I do two bags of lentils? $1.29 each. We eat a lot of lentils and I'm using them in soup when we have friends over this weekend. . . Nah. Better just get one.

These are the kinds of thoughts that go through my head as I move through the store, clearly on a mission.

When the time came for me to checkout and pay and the items were whizzing over the scanner I realized that I had been FAST, but also definitely over budget. Again, I had a second "wave" of items in the wings IF we could afford them. That pile grew as the total on the screen above the cashier grew.

Hold back a pomegranate (Tate LOVES them). Hold back the peanut butter (that was supposed to go with the celery). Hold back the sauerkraut (which was for Reubens, but I didn't get the turkey either... so it looks like we'll be having Swiss cheese sandwiches later). Hold back the cream cheese (for the free bagels we get), the feta (for salad), the extra head of romaine. . and. . . gulp. . . the grapefruit?

Well, I confess I was emotionally attached to the grapefruit at this point, which is why I dug the ones out of my wallet. (I should also confess that while I was counting out my money, the nice looking gentleman behind me in line was counting out his cash as well. The sneaky, greedy little thought entered my mind that maybe God was going to have HIM pay for the extra things I wanted this time. But no. I watched the cashier set aside quite a few of the things I wanted (but apparently didn't need) and I winced as I paid the $86.

When I got home I had a lot of "'splainen" to do.

And if I was feeling strongly about citrus, can you imagine how I felt when NOT ONE HOUR LATER my neighbor knocked on my door and held out three bags. He usually brings bread and bagels, but this time two of the bags held CITRUS: grapefruit, navels, tangerines. Oh my!

I was upset that I couldn't get TWO grapefruit for my family... and God used the hand of Mr. B to bring us TEN grapefruit and more. They had extra at the Salvation Army today. And the Lord promised to supply our every need.

Isn't God merciful to remind me that HE is the one who provides the good things for my family? It's not me. Oh, foolish me.