Reputation

This is a word I don't think of often. It has fallen so far from my general use that I even took time to look it up tonight. Reputation: The honor or credit belonging to one.

We have had several weeks now visiting my parent's farm in northwest IL. This is where I did all of my growing up. My dad still farms with his brother (and my brother and my cousin) on a farm that has been in the family for over 150 years. My Uncle John and Aunt Marilyn live about a mile from my parents. My Aunt Gretchen and Uncle Ray live less than a mile the other direction. My mom's parents live about six miles away. I have relatives dispersed all over the country, but I love that there are still so many here (or not too far away to reunite each summer!). Generations of our family have lived here.

I love being home- whether it's my own home or my parent's. (Is home a state of mind?) I have extended myself on this trip, however, to meet with others. This summer I feel particularly blessed with all I have been learning about health and nutrition and I feel very strongly compelled to share this with others. I've given little talks on nutrition to the high school and jr. high volleyball and basketball teams, a group at church, at my mother-in-law's, and friend Lisa's, and had a little table set up at our town's annual "Old Settler's Days." This has caused me to run into people I know. . . from way back. The minister who baptised me nearly 30 years ago. My parent's friends who have known me since I was born. My past teachers, from grade school though high school. My coaches. My old friends (how sweet to be here to celebrate Kyla's birth with Kim!), an old boyfriend (!) and his family, and many other folks who are woven into the fabric of my life and memory. Many of these people I had honestly forgotten about. I'm surprised to learn that the kids I babysat have kids of their own. So many people who were adults when I was a child have divorced, or passed away, or survived cancer, or moved, or seem to have hardly changed.

In short, I've been away over 10 years and much is different. . . but I'm surprised by the connection and inter-relatedness I feel with these people and this community.

In Virginia (where we have lived for 2 years), or even in Florida (where we lived for 4 years)I had the sense for about the first year or year and a half that I was anonymous. It was kind of fun. I felt footloose and carefree. A bit mischievous, maybe, or just oblivious to what other's might be thinking of me. Now I'm starting to run into people I know around Lynchburg- and I like that. (Well, not so much when my kids and I are struggling!) Reminds me of the theme song for the old show Cheers; I guess I like to go where people know my name. I like the feeling of community.

So, I blather. My point is just that reputation isn't something I've thought of much in the last 10 years because I didn't really have a reputation to speak of. No one really knew me. They didn't have a timeline with me, any perspective. Here, though, I know I have a reputation, even though I haven't been around to do anything to it. My family has a reputation, which is imputed to me. Even though much has changed, I have the sense that reputations don't change so much. It makes me look back and wish I was a lot nicer and kinder when I was growing up, and that I had made better decisions, and it also makes me thankful for the good I did do (could have only been the Lord!). It's great to bring things into perspective again, for I know that everything I do and don't do has eternal value. Even when I feel anonymous, eyes are watching. People do not see the balance of my life, but God sees the sum.

My reputation speaks of my upbringing and my character, how I CHOOSE to live. And even if I don't have much of a reputation within my community, I am always forming one, adding to or taking away from other's opinions. More importantly, however, I am ALWAYS adding to or taking away from my eternal treasures, for the wages of sin is death and the Lord rewards those who earnestly seek Him. It will all come out in the end, and my name is only good because it has the name of Jesus written over it.