Debris of Life

Another week is taking off and once again, I tell myself that we're going to make it. The goals are simple: first things first. First grace and JOY and contentment and love. Then everything else.

And it's easy for me to become distracted by all that is going on. Even now, in the calm of the evening, there are things around me, reminding me of all the life taking place here. And I'm pausing to be grateful for all of it.

474. Quiet hum of the refrigerator
475. Dark blue storm clouds rolling in
476. Coming upon M, standing it the pack'n'play; the look of delight when he sees me
477. Broken glasses- and that quiet moment with R (7) when there was grace and it was good
478. Borrowed grain mill sitting on the counter- the anticipation of fresh bread tomorrow
479. Pot of minestrone in the fridge; an easy lunch! And so good for us.
480. Box of crayons on the counter- reminding me of L's (5) airplanes and poems and drawings of our family. Amazingly, artistically inspired.
481. Deep gouge in the floor where R dropped the mixer- a reminder that we all do life around here, rolling up our sleeves and chipping in and getting it done.
482. Empty laundry basket; today's laundry done and returned.
483. Green glow on the dishwasher; a job I don't have to do tonight. Knowing the clean dishes will be waiting in the morning, constancy.
484. Magnolia and holly at the front door- lovely green and red given by a friend.
485. Handiseat at the table; M is really getting big! And the borrowed booster ready to return.
486. Blankets strewn on floor and sofa and couch from our book time before bed.
489. Reports, papers, calculator on counters; end of the business month.
490. Pitcher of water (with lemon oil!) in its usual place on the counter; R's service of love for me.
491. Bibles, memory verses, school papers, pencils, shoes, books. . . debris of life.

Sleep Experiment- Night 3 and 4

"If you are not getting at least EIGHT hours of sleep each night you are pathologically sleep deprived."
~James Moss: The Power of Sleep

Night 3:
Nurse M and put him to bed at 6:30 p.m.
Nurse at 3:45 a.m.
Nurse at 5:45 a.m. and back to bed
Up at 7:30 a.m. - I like this!

Night 4: (a little off because we were out to a lecture)
Nurse at 7 p.m.
Finally fell asleep about 8 p.m.
Put him in bed when we got home- about 9:30 p.m.
Was inconsolable at 2:30 a.m. (when I was on my way home from another wellness event!)
Nurse at 2:30 a.m.
Nurse at 5:45 a.m.
Up at 7 a.m.

Night 4 was his first night in with L. She loved it... but I'm not convinced it will work. The first time M was up and The Lawyer went to retrieve him, she was standing quietly (and strangely still) beside his pack-n-play. I think she knew that she wasn't supposed to pick him up, but in her haze of sleep she couldn't figure out what to do. I knew that M was awake this morning when I saw her strolling past our bedroom door, baby on hip, headed for the bathroom. Hmmm.

A Little Sleep Experiment

For the past two nights I have put M (9 mo) to sleep in L's (5) room and allowed L to sleep with me. My goal was to see how M would sleep if he wasn't disturbed in the early morning by my waking and getting ready for the day. I also wanted to see how M would sleep if I didn't nurse him each time he whimpered in the night (okay; I'm exaggerating slightly). Because I never know if his cry will be a 30 second cry and back to sleep OR a 1 hour, inconsolable cry- we nurse in the night. It's quick; it's easy; he's right back to sleep and so I am. It seemed to be working, although I'll admit it wasn't an optimal situation. So, this week has been our little sleep experiment.

A couple of things didn't go as planned. The first night, L woke up around 1 a.m. and needed to use the bathroom. Instead, she turned the light on in HER room and woke M. The second night, shortly after I put M down for the night, she went into her room to choose her pajamas and clothes for the following day. And, of course, she's begging to sleep in her room with him. I'm leaning toward allowing her to, simply because she isn't much fun to sleep with (she takes the covers like The Lawyer does!).

And our clock was wrong. Try as I might, I couldn't set it to the correct hour. Just hoping I could remember that it was an hour fast.

Oh, and I got sick one night and have been weary and . . . just sickish. Hence, I haven't eaten much this week. This effects the milk supply, which makes me think that I ought to nurse in the night.

And, I could give my arguments that nursing in the night is acceptable. I think it is. And, I have five babies that I've tried out these theories on- and I don't think I have any conclusions. I've scheduled my babies, let them cry, not let them cry. . .  and I still just don't really know what's right.

But I am tired. And my husband is out of town, making my bed available for the displaced child, freeing up bedroom space. The experiment is on!

Night 1:
Nursed at bedtime; down at 6:45.
Nursed as I was going to bed; 10:30.
M woke and cried out briefly, several times.
Nursed at 3 a.m.
Nursed at 6 a.m. M did not go back to sleep after this.

Night 2:
Nursed at bedtime; down at 6:30.
Nursed between 10:30 and 11. (I don't mind this one as I'm still awake anyway.)
Nursed at 3 a.m. (one side)
Nursed at 5:45 a.m. (M went back to sleep until 6:45).

Tonight is Night 3.

Always Provision

We are reading George Muller's biography by Janet and Geoff Benge. I am loving it! Not only does it thrill my heart to read how children were fed and clothed "through prayer alone," but it is delightful to watch my boys as I read to them. The suspense of the situation is oftentimes riveting: No food and hundreds of orphans sitting down to empty bowls and plates at breakfast. A broken furnace in an orphan house in winter. A fog bank delaying a ship at sea.

And here is my AND YET. In each of these circumstances George Muller prayed. God answered each time. Sometimes when George was yet praying. Sometimes days later. And I am stirred by this faith and my boys' faces light up with delight as I read how the Lord provided.

And aren't we walking our own story of provision? For we have been hungry and received food. And we have had houses sell quickly and we have this house still on the market after seven months. Do we have faith to see that everything is His provision, His perfect will for us? Praise befits Him.

Praise I choose. For in each of these moments I see God's glorious provision in my life:
466. A hike in the February sunshine
467. Boy in the Ergo laying his head on my back as I walk.
468. T, watching an airplane exclaims: "Look! It's like two butter knives!" (the wings)
469. Tall boy (O) doing pull-ups in the basement
470. Family knelt in prayer
471. Girl in the turquoise vest, waiting indecisively at the crossroad (hooray! She wasn't lost!)
472. Quiet in bed with The Lawyer as the sky blues in the morning- a holiday!
473. HOPE in conversations expected, looked-forward-to (I'm not forgotten)

Winter Fare

Sometimes you have to see it to believe it. This was our dinner tonight- true winter fare. I used the crock pot for a venison roast (#455 thanks for the gift, Andrew!) and added rutabaga, parsnips (which no one seemed to like roasted), carrots, and potato. Then, I sauteed red cabbage with some Bragg's (liquid aminos). When I looked down at my plate, I was startled by the color and beauty- even if I can't take a decent foodie photo. The BEST part was that everyone loved it- and I have the photos of the empty bowls to prove it. 

Winter Stew- Venison, Parsnips, Rutabega, Carrots, Potato... and Cabbage

His first bowl was finished before I had my first bite.

T asked to have his picture taken.

He says he doesn't like cabbage... but he eats it!

this was her second helping.

Oh, but there have been more gifts lately! And I need to continue counting (can't believe I'm nearly halfway to 1000!)
#456 "Mom! They're dancing!" L (5) exclaimed over swirling leaves in the wind.
#457 the leaves DID dance- an perfect circle of leaves round and round
#458 Bird in flight, gliding on the strong February drafts
#459 Playing at the park in February. Oh, parks! We've missed you.
#460 Black heels. Found a pair today I love- and after 75% off and $15 credit.. they were $10!
#461 Bubble bath with a book.
#462 Neighbor coming over at the last minute so I could run out by myself to pick up L.
#463 M (9 mo) waving bye-bye and saying ah-da for all done. SO great.
#464 Good quiet talks in the night with the boys; heart checks after a long day
#465 Moonlight

Chocolate Valentine Custard Cakes

Oh, yum. L (5) helped me make these "chocolate molten cakes" (originally found in Womans Day magazine) today. We changed a few things, whipped them up rather quickly, and served them, dusted with powdered sugar, on our red china plates as a Valentine dessert after lunch (because Daddy was home today).  They were beautiful, and I should have taken a picture- but I didn't have time because the boys devoured theirs. L and I both agreed, however, that even after we had slowly savored ours we could eat another one. (gasp!) They were deeply chocolate with gooey centers that were custardy-delicious.

The recipe we used was for two cakes, but we tripled it to make six for our family. I'm giving the ingredients for both, so whether you are just celebrating with your love or with your whole family you will be able to make this as a spontaneous treat. Methinks it will be a new Valentine tradition around here. So simple, so quick, so delicious!


Chocolate Valentine Custard Cakes
for two:
4 Tbsp butter or coconut oil (plus more for ramekins)
1 Tbsp flour (plus more for ramekins)
1/3 cup bittersweet or dark chocolate chips
1 large egg
1 large egg yolk
1 Tbsp sweetener (we used sucanat)

for six:
3/4 cup coconut oil (plus)
3 Tbsp flour (plus)
1 cup dark chocolate chips (or xocai!)
3 eggs plus 3 egg yolks
3 Tbsp sweetener

1. Heat oven to 450. Butter ramekins and dust with flour.
2. Melt oil or butter and chocolate over low heat on the stove, stirring until smooth.
3. Beat eggs, egg yolk, and sugar with a mixer until thick and lighter in color (about 2 minutes). Add melted chocolate and flour and beat until fully incorporated and smooth.
4. Divide the batter between ramekins. Bake until edges are set and center still jiggles slightly (or looks barely set), about 8-10 minutes.
5. Remove from oven; let stand 15 seconds. Run a knife around the edge, then invert each cake onto a plate. Dust with sugar (or not) and garnish with fresh mint or fruit (optional).

Happiness Is...

Leaving the ENT office triumphantly yesterday, I felt happiness I haven't felt in a long time.

It had been a long week with M (9 mo) having ear pain again. He wasn't napping well, was writhing and screaming out through the nights, and I was at a loss as to how to help him. I didn't think my remedies were working and finally, on Thursday, B and I decided that I should call the ENT our pediatrician had referred us to and seek a pre-op consultation for tubes.

I'm not completely opposed to tubes. R had tubes. BUT, tubes are invasive and require anesthesia. They also cost money. And even though they allow drainage, they don't fix whatever it is that is causing the fluid to linger in the ear canal. However, I was desperate for the relief that tubes could bring for my baby (and me?). I made the appointment, but then immediately called my friend Jaime. Jaime is a living encyclopedia of natural remedies and supplements. On Thursday, she gave me a couple suggestions to try, because even if we did need to get tubes, there would still be several days and nights to survive and relief for M was critical.

So, we loaded everyone up and went to the health food store (again!). Once we were there, I realized I didn't have enough money to buy both the bromelain and elderberry that Jaime had recommended. BUT, I also realized that JuicePlus+ vineyard has elderberry in it and the orchard blend has bromelain (pineapple) and I committed there to giving M more orchard and starting the Vineyard for him. The naturopathic dr. at the health food store recommended another tincture, and it was less expensive, so I decided to try it.

Then, on Friday we had M's scheduled appointment. Loaded everyone up again, stopped at the library first, and waited at the ENT office with a bag of books. The kids were wonderfully quiet! The appointment was exceptionally brief- NO FLUID.

Amazing.

The ENT said that M's ears looked fine. He thought that if we could "hold off" on doing anything (i.e. tubes) for another month we would be through the winter and the fluid should go away on its own. That was his recommendation! And, just to be on the safe side, he thought we should use an antibiotic and a sulfa drug to keep infection at bay.

I couldn't help grinning. "Sir," I said. "I'll respectfully decline that prescription as it seems that what we are doing is working just fine."

Yay for good friends (#447) and health food stores (#448) and JuicePlus+ (#449)! Yay for waiora (#450)! Yay for a good night's sleep (#451)! Yay for probiotics (#452) and doctors who look for the cause of the problem (#453)! Yay for oils to calm the nervous system, to support the immune system, to kill bacteria (#454)! Yay for no tubes! Yay for a happy baby and a happy mommy.

So Happy.

Not Speaking the Same Language

I don't even remember the words of the conversation now, and it happened just two days ago. I was trying to get M (9 mo) ready for bed and help T (3) in and out of the bath. The water was running, M was crawling away, and L (5) was leaning over my shoulder.  I was trying in vain to communicate with T.

I said what I said (that I don't remember).
T: What?
I said what I said again.
T: What?
I said what I said a third time.
T: What?
Me: What part of what I'm saying don't you understand?
T: Any of it!
Me: Really?
L: She's speaking English, T. You speak English. You are speaking the same.
T: What?

Um. Yep. But that wasn't helping us at all.

My Great Life

I feel conspicuously absent from the blog, noting that I seem to only post on Mondays anymore. It just isn't fun to write about what everyone asks (no, no interest in the house. yes, still living apart), and there hasn't been time for much else (what with traveling, M's ear infections, and the crush of life). Would that I were an interesting blogger with all kinds of fun, challenging, interesting things for you to read! Ah, but that wouldn't be true of my life right now. . . my GREAT life.

Yes, I have a great life. I'm saying it more and more these days. Saying it is a way of claiming it and affirming it and making it so. Because, of course it IS. I mean, I'm ALIVE! (#427) And this is the year to grow in JOY. So, I'm focusing on the great things in my life. Thinking on them magnifies them in my mind. What an amazing thing our minds are (#428)!

Some great things about my life:
#429 My husband still says I'm beautiful and he looks at me that way
#430 I can snuggle boys in bed when my man is gone
#431 The baby (9mo) is astounding in his achievements. Just this week he started pulling up on things, pointing, and waving "bye" consistently
#432 Surprise gift card on the windshield (= groceries!)
#433 Thoughtful mother sending gifts
#434 Friends who come over to visit
#435 JuicePlus+ friends who challenge and inspire me
#436 Having things on hand to fight off illness (love that the runny noses were only for a day)
#437 Rare quiet moments to sit by the heater with my Bible
#438 Freezer of venison, generously given and brought to VA from IL
#439 Soft sheets and warm quilt to tuck into
#440 Excitement of sharing health with others and seeing the good changes taking place
#441 Kids coloring and listening (and talking!) as I read aloud
#442 ... always begging for "one more chapter?!"
#443 Conversation while washing dinner dishes
#444 Baby smiles at siblings; such an innate love!
#445 The great feeling of exercising. It feels so good to do push ups and pull ups and to get sweaty
#446 HOPE - not in being reunited or the house selling or people staying healthy... but a hope that does not disappoint; the hope of glory

February and Immunity

It's February now, and we have deceivingly warm days followed by chilling damp. Just when everyone seems healthy, I note a different tone in our daughter's voice, the baby's nose starts to run, and the three year old cries out uncomfortably in the night.

Cold temperatures alone are not what make people sick this time of year. Our immune systems are also impaired by being sedentary, spending time indoors with other sick people, and having limited exposure to sunlight. Researchers know that the majority of immune function (near 80%) takes place in the gut. This is why what we eat and drink is so critically important. There is a recent study that is garnering worldwide media attention on how Juice Plus+® reduces severe cold symptoms. We take extra JuicePlus+ when we feel illness approaching. I also add powerful spices such as garlic, turmeric, and cumin to our foods. We diffuse Thieves throughout the house and use R.C. while we sleep. I keep Colloidal Silver handy, as well.

Still, there may be weary days ahead as we move through the bleak mid-winter and into the blustery spring. . .

Life Around Here

L (5) often has M (9 mo) on her hip.

L (5) and T (3) have play-doh as an activity during school one morning/week.

I felt like a "good mom" the day we made these fun Valentine cards. What a fun idea from http://planted-by-streams.blogspot.com/

O (9) really loved the project and made several. This is his full-size paper Valentine.

Who does these things?! We are overwhelmed by gifts we do not deserve. This was on our van today; completely amazing gift. At the beginning of the week I was crying out to God that we were hungry and our children needed clothes. (The grocery allowance didn't go very far when we were out of many staples. L's three pairs of pants all have irreparable holes, and M was lacking long sleeves.) HE said he will not let us go hungry and surely He knows how to clothe us. THIS. Oh, THIS gift! And yesterday, a package from my mom arrived- with clothes (a vest for me!) and food (maple syrup!). And Friday, a friend brought us pizza. He heard; He answered. Oh, what a faith investment! Surely He hears our groans over our house and He is working it out perfectly, for our good and His glory.

When O (9) is watching M (9 mo), yet wants to read instead, I hear music and find THIS.